31

 So,
 Today went about like I expected it would go. Robin would have been 31 today. I woke up readying myself for it, but it didn't take long for it all to settle in. Taking the kids out to play in the snow was a good diversion.

 I'm also lucky that I have a lot of friends helping me through all of this. It's still gonna take some time.

 It came to a head tonight when we sang happy birthday to Robin before we had cupcakes, which she always loved. I got the baby set with hers, and I went to have my breakdown. After that, I got out some pictures and looked through them, and I spent some time in meditation, getting back my kumai.

 Looking at her pictures and remembering life from them almost makes it like she isn't gone. It only hurts when you have to come back.

 So I'll just keep moving forward, one day at a time.

I miss her.